Purgatory

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ZookiMelt 2002: Purgatorywith Kevin Walker Pictures by Tom Wood and Kevin Walker

Main Entry: purgatory Pronunciation: ‘p&r-g&-“tOr-E, -“tor- Function: noun Inflected Form(s): plural -ries Etymology: Middle English, from Anglo-French or Medieval Latin; Anglo-French purgatorie, from Medieval Latin purgatorium, from Late Latin, neuter of purgatorius purging, from Latin purgare Date: 13th century

1: An intermediate state after death for expiatory purification; specifically: a place or state of punishment wherein according to Roman Catholic doctrine the souls of those who die in God’s grace may make satisfaction for past sins and so become fit for heaven

2: A place or state of temporary suffering or misery

3: A trail located in Attica, Indiana at The Badlands ORV Park that is responsible for axle breakage, body mutilation, twisting of steering components, and other such atrocities.

Purgatory is a trail that 4 others and myself came face to face with on the sunny Friday morning of July 12, 2002. It all started out as five zooks who were going to warm up on the nastiest trail available to the public at The Badlands. Jeff Pollock was to be our trail guide for this 3-hour tour and none other than I, Gilligan, I mean Kevin Walker, was tail gunning. Brent Bradshaw, Hector Valenzuela and Chris Robbins completed the group.

As we approached the trailhead, the previous group was still there and they were in the middle of setting a zook back up on all 4’s. The start of Purgatory is overlooked by the start of the Blue trail. There was quite an audience gathering above on the Blue trail as the zook was placed back on the rubber side. Along the first part of Purgatory is a 20-foot wall bordering the left side of the trail, to the right is a nice drop off that is full of trees. Along the center of the trail is a conglomeration of rocks that are nothing short of small boulders. At the end, the 20-foot wall cuts hard right and you have to crawl up a nearly vertical ledge that cast you into a rock garden. As our fearless leader Jeff began to tackle the trail that he had done with the grace and elegance of a ballerina just the day before, Satan reared his ugly head and knocked Jeff into a bind of epidemic proportions. Having flowed over the trail on Thursday, Jeff decided to try all the harder lines. Jeff immediately got caught up in some big rocks and they kept forcing him to the edge of the trail that overlooked a nice drop off. We hooked up the winch and got Jeff back on the right track, but not before his right front tire quit pulling. Once we got Jeff off the trail, closer inspection revealed that the hub had unlocked itself internally. Tom Wood installed a spare hub that I had for insurance and Jeff was ready to continue. Chris Robbins took a different line and had a flawless run on the first section. Next up were Brent and Linda Bradshaw in the Crustacean. This eighth wonder of the world. oops, I mean eight-wheeled wonder was the most amazing thing to watch in person. This thing should be called “The Octopus” because each one of his tires acts like an individual tentacle and sticks to the rocks. There is no way to describe this thing in action without seeing it with your own two eyes. Brent definitely out did himself on the engineering of this creature.